Computer Science is Paradise
你做到了。经过10000个小时的记忆，SAT数学问题后，您进入了一所极具声望的学校，您的种族主义大家庭不知道。您决定主修计算机科学，因为让我们面对现实吧，您是书呆子。即使您做出了一些可疑的决定（例如，试图询问CARC 2课程中的可爱的高年级），您也做出了正确的选择。
经过4年的比赛，从您的Comp Sci大楼的9层窗户上观看Brad Chug Natty Lite，通过Leetcode Bullshit进行磨削，并进行了2张Faang实习，您已经有招聘人员在狩猎，就像一个单独坐着的金发碧眼的人一样在潜水吧。一些San Fransico的初创公司致力于将发霉的面包变成IPA，为您提供了200k，但是一个叫Shitadel的地方说，他们将向您支付350k的付费（只要您能以空洞的感觉为社会贡献任何东西，只要您可以睡觉）。您问摩尔迪帕，他们是否可以稍微提高赌注，他们说他们会在4年内给您25万和200万股票。你签名。
It's easy. After a few years of writing javascript for 3 hours and playing video games for the rest of the day, MoldPA goes public and your shares are now worth a cool 10M. You cash out, and decide to build your own startup focused on selling the data of old people who try to use dating websites.
You want more money, so you go to theVCfirm next door from your SF penthouse, and you prepare to give them your pitch. You clear your breath -- "Hello! I'm aCSgrad from Stanf--" One of the principals interrupts you like you're a shitty district attorney and they're the judge in the Kyle Rittenhouse case.
"How much do you want?"
You say 50M cause it's a nice even number.
You decide to walk intoHBSto network more for your brand new company. It's filled with people like Brad who used to do something called investment banking. They brag about their pay -- you do the mental math (that interview grind prepared you well) and gasp as you realize these poor fuckers were making 20 bucks an hour. That's like, half the minimum wage in the Bay Area.
You work on your company, and after a few weeks, you get bought out by some of the Brads and Chads you knew fromHBS. They do something called Private Equity now. They tell you it's so much better than what they used to do, and how it's the new banking, but like, prestigious. You smile and nod as their boss hands you a check for 4 times what you got to start the company.
Life is good.
Comments (38)
极好的。做得好
10/10
You forgot the part about donating money to left-wing causes and preaching about smashing capitalism while making bank selling old people's private information.
Hey, don't be so reductive and salty. They also sell young people's private information.
This is one of the best things I've read in a while, bravo lol
So good and quite accurate.
I mean if that's all it takes I'd love to do this.
你砍了我的大脑
It really do be like that.
LMAO
I came.
This is too hilarious. I am being told by the Directors in programming/data to pursue something like this. Interesting take.
The bodies of computer science majors is confusing. I stare at them and can't tell whether they're fat or skinny.
It's called skinny fat haha
从来没有说过真实的话
Great post man, seriously.
您忘记了没有睡眠和遇到编译器错误的部分。
It glosses over several things, but long debugging hours is a great way to weed off people who can't even do basic coding, let alone think about the abstract concepts
I still don't understand why people work random Silicon Valley jobs for 4-7 months.
I thought consulting was a bit odd with the 2 years in and out.
每次跳跃时，您都会得到薪水，这是一件广泛接受的事情，为什么不这样做。尽管工作很糟糕，否则4-7个月并不完全普遍。通常两次移动1-2年
Says the "Intern in Consulting"
This was good, can't even hate on the SWE bros
Reality.
？？？？？？？？banking is full of risk averse nerds and tame giraffes coming over fromMBAprograms
dont stereotype bro
什么音乐会花费45美分？50美分的壮举。镍背。
You forgot the part where Chad gets 5% of the profit when he flips your little shitter company for a 100 bagger 2 years later after some numbers massaging.
Repeat this 20 times a year with 20 companies and you'll see why Chad is more prestigious than you
当我的牛排摇摇欲坠时，我总是喂我的牛排5％！好男孩乍得。
Tale of massaging numbers though
但是在这种情况下，您花了数十亿美元购买牛排，而您所有的狗都必须做的就是摇动他的尾巴。
As long has the dog knows what he's worth!
*as
现在写一个绝对1 -在- 1000万南加州爱迪生公司最好的情况nario for Finance
I realize this is partly a troll, but why do people still think bankers make $20/hour? Assuming a 70 hour week at 170k all in it's almost ~47/hour. An MD will make 500-600/hour
取出计算器并做一些简单的部门。
edit: whoever threw MS quit before their bonus hit or works at a no-name sweat shop
70小时超低，而且还有机会成本，即没有加班费。因此， @90小时内的170k每小时约为37个小时，但是如果这是一项理智的工作，加班费您的平均时间将为每小时约48，大约增加60％。
70 is standard for non-tech coverage. I take your point though
I work at FAANG after an internsip inBBbut amstill working 60 hours a day:(
But it's still a great write-up
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