...or at least Whiskey thinks so.
我们很无聊。决定做一些随意的拖钓和过度承诺。AH一直将威士忌抬起并种下种子（双关语）连续两天，从自杀到威士忌，他是否认为我会嫁给她。
She told Whiskey I didn't know yet and asked him to speak to me about it. The entire convo is below. It's long but some parts I thought were pretty funny:
我什么
Whiskey: bro
ok
我被迫与您进行这次对话。所以不要讨厌信使
我：你快死了
威士忌：我将如何成为使者
damn
me: cause im ok
with that
LOL
威士忌：哎呀
me: sorry go
Whiskey: LOL
fucking troll
好的，不认真
我：耶稣的idk消息
威士忌：昨天我发现了你啊。她吓坏了。她说她错过了她的月经
she texted me
and was freaking out n shit
she was like can u please talk to flake
etc etc
我觉得这是我这样做的地方，但是她一直在聊天，不停地聊天
我什么do you mean found out about me and ah?
what did she tell you
喜欢everything lol
Whiskey: oh she just said after we all met up
you went back to her hotel
me: oh wtf
okay
威士忌：真的很模糊
me: and she missed her period.
wtf
那个狗屎多久以前
Whiskey: yeah she took a test and said positive
me: when did she come here
...
你在拖我吗
Whiskey: no
unless she is trolling me
and i dont think she is
她真的很尴尬地和你谈论
which is why she has been avoiding you
me: positive?
...
喜欢
对一个他妈的孩子肯定
Whiskey: yeah...
我：他妈的男人，我总是拉出来，我做了很多他妈的时间
no way
and i never had this
他妈的恐慌
wtf
so shes what like
4周
5?
威士忌：她昨天告诉我
so must be around 4
me: cant you abort that shit
up to like 2 months or something
哇
my stomach just sank
威士忌：是的，我不知道该怎么说。兄弟抱歉
me: if you're fucking with me i will kill you lmao
威士忌：我绝对不是
承诺
me: ...
how the fuck
现在我该怎么做
我不要那狗屎
威士忌：我不怪你
我：我的意思是我不能走开，如果她以任何搞砸的原因保留她的法律求助权，她没有法律求助？
Whiskey: i mean if shit really goes down, you may want to talk to a lawyer about it
i mean when we spoke, i asked if shes keeping it. shes like
"i'm very pro life, blah blah"
我：好的，每个职业生命小鸡都可能说，直到狗屎撞到粉丝
im afraid to call her i cant even fucking talk right now
除了她可能甚至不会接
Whiskey: i told her to call you many times
and shes just like freaking out n shit
ill see if i can get her to call you?
星期二晚上9:29发送
我：她最好他妈的做某事。
Whiskey: i'll text her hang on
Sent at 9:30 PM on Tuesday
我：这太荒谬了
Whiskey: yeah shes definitely being immature about it
Sent at 9:33 PM on Tuesday
威士忌：她会打给你一些
she says
me: okay.
thanks.
Whiskey: sure thing. dont hate the messenger though!
Sent at 9:35 PM on Tuesday
我：好吧，她他妈的歇斯底里
im going to fucking drive down there or some shit
she'll do something stupid i know it
she just hung up on me and wont pick up again. i told her not to keep it...wtf am i being unreasonable here
威士忌：嗯
Sent at 9:40 PM on Tuesday
我：好吧，我明天他妈的
im going
之后
Whiskey: ok man
我：他妈的启蒙
去d damn it
Whiskey: take it easy
me: is going to be so fucking pissed for having to work this weekend
wtfdo you tell him, "IM HAVING AF UCKING BABY"
上帝他妈的该死
why didnt u tell me ysterday
威士忌：伙计，她不想让我说什么
me: i could've planned a day off earlier or some shit or stayed late last nightto go there today
威士忌:我told her you needed to know
我：那是你告诉我男人wtf的事情
是的，没什么
Whiskey: dude i swear i thought
she was trolling me
鉴于4月2日
以为是四月下旬的傻瓜
shit*
我：是的
alright fuck it. whatever happens at work tomorrow happens. she's unstable
i dont een know if she has roommates and shit
that would take care of her right now
does she? did she tell u she does?
威士忌：是的，她确实有室友
我：我什至不知道她是否生活在一个
okay
jesus
Whiskey: dont just drive down there man that wouldn't be so good
我：wtf你愿意吗
威士忌：一定要先通过电话通话。
我：她不会他妈的答案！
Whiskey: so what happened on the phone?
you guys spoke for like a minute and she hung up?
我：我有点抢了她。好的，我的错，但是什么他妈的？就像为什么她不会先来找我。
then i told her she cant keep it and her time is running out to do it
她崩溃了，说我该死的混蛋
and hung up on me
Whiskey: ok so i'll get you guys on the phone again
但绝对不要那样做
给它一个日子让它平静下来，我会尽力让她接你的电话
and just talk to her
because its obvious she doesn't want a kid either. it works in your favor
Sent at 9:50 PM on Tuesday
Whiskey: also don't blow off work. that's the last thing you want to put at risk
me: did you talk to her?
她打电话
ok i gtg
病看看我是否去
之后
Whiskey: ok
no i haven't talked to her
Comments (19）
Dude he'll be so pissed.
Whiskey baby im sorry!!!
威士忌：您不必保留它...那是你和他之间的我：不！我是亲生的！！！arrrg
http://i43.tinypic.com/x1ly1h.png http://i42.tinypic.com/vde6b7.png http://i43.tinypic.com/348sxmc.jpg http://i42.tinypic.com/4i0iyt.jpg http://i42.tinypic.com/nn8gn6.png http://i39.tinypic.com/10qe4jq.jpg
i love you all.
this is my favorite: http://i42.tinypic.com/21jn0hs.jpg
为什么我现在还在起来？？？？因为我在11:00回到公寓？？？？他妈的我明天要工作... ！！！
so flake fucked ah but pulled out the last moment and on Aprils fools day, ah and whiskey pranked flake that ah was pregnant and flake didnt give a shit...
I actually like that story better. Let's go with that.
lmao no, Flake and I pranked Whiskey... I went to Whiskey first telling him about a fake relationship and how I think I'm pregs, asking him to tell Flake for me...
What's funny is the majority of casual readers and infrequent posters probably hadn't realized that ah is a female before this and thought this was the gayest thing ever.
u should name it OJ
Boozing at 2AM on a Tuesday? Damn I'm miss my 20's.
愚蠢的威士忌...
There's a chat on here? lol
Flake actually enjoyed fantasizing about having a baby with ah. True life.
And what?
您是否可以通过屁股获得预盖？
et iure aut numquam除外。deleniti iusto autem culpa sit必需品。
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